Watching : The Forgotten

My birthday is on the 19th of January, yeah, I'm getting old. I feel old.

I have to trade in my PS2 for a new one.. due to the fact that my PS2 is the one that I carried over from the States and well, the system needs to be modified for it to be able to play here and for me to get the games here.. anyhow.. PS2 got a new version, which is smaller and thinner.. so I'm thinking of tradding my old one in and get a new one. With that I'm gonna have to pay more money for the difference.. Yup, I'm gonna be broke, but with the new one I'll be able to play game from any zone. ('cause they already modified the system)

Anyhow, I'm expecting not to be able to get anything else this month after this..

Then...

My mom said she'll pay for me..

Woooooohooooooooo..

wait, there's a catch, there's a big 'IF' it's not too expensive.. yeah I guess I'm gonna end up ditching out some cash as usual. You'd have thought I got use to paying thing for myself after 8 years in the States and noone for me to ask things from. Man, my birthday's gonna be just as bad as always.

Listening : Broken [ Seether ]

Well, a greeting card arrived today from insurance company for my little brother (the annoying pest that thinks he can just slide through school and not really paying any attention, I think if you open his head you'll only see info on games.. and not much else) And well, I liked the illustration so I'm gonna use it for blog layout.. I'm gonna try to get it done and coded tomorrow, actually, it should be.. today since it's 3:15 AM already. LOL

I've been busy.

I want Sony Handycam and well, apparently my uncle is going to buy it for me.. 'cause I don't have any money and I didn't wanna be asking my parents.. I could, of couse and my dad would say he'll just take so much out of my pay and stuff.. in actuality he might or might not.. depends.. it's not like they gonna let me starve to dead or anything, well, it's a possibility.

But my uncle said he's gonna get it for me.. under the condition that he can borrow it. I said sure, not a problem. I think it's because he's pissed at his in law.. he said if he can spend that much money on people that can't be fair and help him out then he can spend on his niece ( me ) since my dad helped him a lot. And being me.. I'll take what people give me. I mean, you don't turn down free stuff. Besides I didn't ask for it. My dad mentions it.. and my other uncle said he's gonna get me it, except my mom cut him off while he was saying it and he's my mom younger brother so you can see how that one went..

Yup, I got zilch!

I don't know, if I actually get it, we'll all know then, won't we.

Besides, my uncle was drunk at the time, he might forget all about it when he's sobered up.

Man, should I keep my fingers crossed so someone actually get it for me for my birthday? Early birthday.. cause well, it's still another month or so.

I hate my birthday by the way, it usually suck beyond belief.

let's hope we get through the new year.

Tomorrow or rather today is a day off.. yeah I got those twice a month, so I'm gonna try to make the best of it.. be it the day I sleep it all off or doing something productive.

Ha ha ha.

I gotta clean though, and then do the blog layout and do some writing. Shit piled up when you don't have time.

There should be more than 24 hours a day, or maybe I should require less than 8 hours of sleep.. something like 3 hours would give me time to do things.

Or I can just lock myself in the room once I get back from the store and pretend the rest of the house don't exist.. um.... that one has potential.

Watching : Spiderman 2

Well, I finally got my ADSL, much better, let me tell you. I was about had it with the damn sattlelite.. I got kicked out so many times it's not even funny. I guess when you came from Cable where you are constantly on, you can't take anything less, cause it'll drive you crazy.

Anyhow, this thing isn't as fast as what I had before, but it'll have to do for now, seeing how it's the fastest I'm gonna get in this place, maybe in a year we'll get up to speed, I'm waiting for the day.

Work, well, as busy as always, I'm trying though.. it's not that it's so busy, it's the limited access I got on my comp. I can't do any writing if I don't have the comp kinda thing. Well, I use my sis's laptop while I'm at the store, I just can't get online with it, cause I'm too lazy to get out and get a phone line.. LOL.

I play badminton with my dad everyday, 30 min a day. It's fun and well, afterwards you feel like you've been running in the rain, cause you really are sweaty, like your entire clothe got soaked. Fun.

I found that I can order books through a bookstore here.. a plus.. big plus. I hate having to ask people to get them for me.. seeing how it's such a drag. This way, even though I spend a bit more on it, I don't have to owe anyone a favor. That tend to get ugly.

Well, I'm loading stuff, I think I'm gonna just leave it running tonight so I get them all done. :) Bed time.

Nite nite..

Oh yeah, hi to everyone... :)

Cindy!! How ya doing???

Helga.. miss ya kitty...

Yo, Jamie!

Hey Baby G! I'm thinking of christmas present for ya.. :) How about a little 'faith'

Hi Psy, whacha want for X-Mas??

Listening : This Photograph Is Proof [Taking Back Sunday]

Happy Halloween!!!!!

I got my mom and my sister a bag of Kisses.

Well, it's not a big thing here in Thailand so.. ya know.. no fun. Salem would be jumping with people, witches, gouls, goblins, monsters, vampire and such and man, it would be fun to be there.

Not that I ever get the patience to be there while I was in MA anyway. LOL

Happy B-day for my best big Sis. :)

Happy B-day psy!!

I've seen THE GRUDGE and all I can say was.. SMG was ADORABLE!!!

God it's so good to see her on big screen. It was great, she was awesome!

And in that bubble jacket and jeans and pony tail... I was in heaven (except that whole scary thing)

Hi to everyone. I've been so busy it's not even funny. Work hasn't let up for me, if anything it just got worse. My books still on the floor of my room and haven't been arrange or anything. I don't even get time to do my own laundry and I don't like other people doing mine. Only cause I have to wait for other people.

A lot of time I wish I never've left.

I don't like to deal with unreasonable people and stupid people. Just make things worse.

I'm playing badminton with my dad everyday for 30 min.. and it's 30 min straight of nothing but hitting the birdy as hard as I can and make sure it reach the back of the court everytime from my spot at the back.. trust me 30 min is more than enough. A game would've been less exhausted than this, cause you get a time out while serving. This you just smacking the thing back and fort and serve without looking where it has to land you just have to hit it right.

More workout.

I actually want the weight machine and such and also a trademill.. cause it'd be nice to get to workout like that.

I don't even get to think about karate.. sad really. I love my black belt.

Life suck and then you die.

Ah....

It's been a long while that I get to update. Only because I've been so busy with everything, what else is new, right? I mean, I'm still trying to learn while there's no one that actually know what the hell they are doing to teach me.. and who the hell am I suppose to be learning from? And things are quite messy and I can't really get things organize.. nope, not a thing. I'm trying though. Which is still not good enough.

We got the equipments for the security camera.. although they are not yet in place.. in a day or two they will be.

Then there a bunch of other things.

High season is coming and we are not ready, well, we better be, I guess..

Big Hello to everyone.. I don't have the time to contact you, but I miss you guys. :)

-_- *tired*

Ok, so I should be getting ready and out the door by now, but I'm still brushing my teeth!!

Anyway, the annoying thing with the screen solution is over and done with, now I'm figuring out if I wanna sync my ppc with my laptop or my desktop, or should I do both... and I also left my sister's laptop at the store due to the fact that it'll get used that way. (mine doesn't have thai and to type in the details it's just insane.. I mean I can and it'll be just for me, I'd like other people to read it too.)

I shoulda get that book on ppc yesterday if not for just the instruction then for the games.. not that I play I mean, my mom probably will.

Ok, gotta go for now... getting dress and all that.

Watching : Buffy:tVS ep Gingerbread

I've been very busy lately. It seems as if I can't get the time to sit down and do the things I wanted to.

Actually, I get the afternoon to kinda goof off.. but due to the lack of privacy I couldn't really write or do any of the collages like I wanted. Maybe I'll just go and get an empty room and then just sit down and write. I think that'll work better.

In the past month, I've had to:
- lectured my father over the damn project and people that borrowed money. He said to look at people on the bright side.. I said nope.. trusting people usually lead to disappointment. So, I'm being the pessimist to his optimistic view of people. However, he knew I'm right and he can't argue with me.

- argued with my mother over my sister's behavior. She made excuses for that lazy ass and I have no patient for it. She cries over the stupid thing. She's an idiot and until she grows the fuck up, I won't think otherwise.

- oversee the damn project while my mother gives me shit over things that's not my fucking fault in the fist place.

Tomorrow agenda is writing, I'm gonna go hide in vacant room and write to my heart content... or making collages, possibly both at the same time.

I tried to load XXXHolics but man, just couldn't. Can't wait for ADSL, seems like sattlelite didn't go that fast, well, it's faster than dial-up, as for loading from bittorent, I'm not sure if it was me or there was no one to load from... grrrrrrrr..

Listening : my niece whining...

I've been home almost a month now and well, I'm just trying to grasp the situation. And pretty much have to clean up other people's mess. Mainly my father.. ain't that suck. Now he's out of town, although I did tell him that from now on, everything has to go through me and no one borrow any money. They all can go to hell.

I'm just being really harsh, but the situation required it. I mean, my mom is going through the freaking roof now. Last thing I want is for her to get to that point and get sick.

I got the layout for this blog ready tomorrow so I can get a new layout up. I mean I like this layout cause it's SMG, but it's time for a new one.

Hello to everyone, (if anyone read this that is) I'm back!!

Let's see...

today I got 2 combinations, 2 kenpos.. combination #25 and 28 and 2 black belt kenpos.. which I better remember, although I think I will remember them better than my brown belt ones.. cause they gave to me without any designation at all.. that didn't help..

they were really cool, I like them. Damage to the max. :) FUN!

I better get to bed.. before I fall asleep on the keyboard, that would be embarrassing and not to mention.. chance of keyboard being shorted out from drooling.. that's worse. LOL

I went and saw The Chronicles of Riddick the other night.. I loved it! Although I think that Vin Desel suited the role that didn't require much talking.. he always has that same tone.

I enjoy the movie though, a lot.. even though it was at 12:25 and I was up all day I didn't fall asleep on it.. which is definitely a plus.

I love all thos ships and costume.. very H.R. Giger.

On the other note.. I will be moving by the 23 of this month.. I'm going home!!

Elphie!!

Thank you, I was all nerve, ya know big ball of nerve and nothing else.. they warned me not to eat too much before hand and guess what, I had a couple chips and that's it.. I was starving, my foot hurts.. exhausted.. it's a good test though..

Thank you again.

Cin!

HOw ya doing?? Thank you.. :) I've been looking forward to it, now everyone in class has to bow to me. HEHEHE..

I have cold now.. what a perfect timing.. at least it wasn't during.. or it would've been really bad.

Sleepy now..

As of today, I'm a 1st degree black belt...

YEAH!!!!

Of course my foot hurts as hell and I got bruises all over my arms, but that's ok. It's all good. Now I just wanna sleep..

Listen : Superstar [ Tegan&Sarah ]

I was watching Buffy:tVS season 4 dvd, the set which Baby G got for me with X-Files season 8 dvd set.. Love ya G. And I was watching 'This Year Girl' of course.. I couldn't resist cause Faith was in it!!! I watched it with commentary with Douge Petrie.. who was the writer. He said 'All she dreams about is Buffy.' in Faith's dream sequences, and how Faith couldn't stay away from Buffy. I mean.. subtext anyone??? Ok, so he said it was more sisterly, sibling rivalry kinda thing, but come on!!

Anyway, I just thought it was funny. But then we get to see Buffy as a badguy, cause that's how she was in Faith's dreams. Eliza looked good!! And SMG looked soooooooooo good.. well, both of them.. hehe..

Ok, in about 2 weeks I'll have my black belt test.. I don't know if I'm ready for it.. I mean, I've been so busy and stressed out that I can barely do anything.. and when I get to do anything I'm just tired. Like today, I could do 8 rounds.. (ok, in that I mean.. we start with 8 laps around the dojo, 8 jumping jack, 8 push-up, 8 sit-up then we work our way down.. 7, 6, 5, you got the idea...) I got to about 4 and I was just dead.. I mean I can probably push for it, but I could feel it.. so I stopped for a breather and let them continue.. ( of course Sensei Stella happened to knock me with her knuckles... right at my temple.. I felt the migrain right then ) I'm so out of it.. this is what happen when I don't really get into class for almost 2 weeks.. 2 stressful weeks of final projects.. We're picking the stuff up on June 1st. Chaos.. let me tell ya, chaos.

Got LotR : RotK.. I'm gonna go watch it now.. hehe..

Baby G got me X-Files season 9 and B:tVS season 4!!! WOOOOO HOOOOOOOOO!!! In exchange of me drawing B:tVS doujinshi for her.. (well, adaptation of her fanfic 967-Buffy) nice deal I'll say..

Finally, I'm done with school and I mean DONE!!

The final review was on Monday, my time was at 4PM. For senior we have the show over at the gallery downtown, means we have to content ourselves with finding the parking when we go there. There's a parking garage, but I'm not sure where that is.

So, I got there almost an hour early, because I always do. Just in case I got stuck, couldn't find parking I still have time. So I got there and unlike the usual occurance.. they were early. Yup, the committee was early in their review, it's like once in a blue moon, let me tell you. At midterm they started it late.. and I mean late.. 30 min late and when the schedule is 15 min per person.. it didn't help, it was like a mad scramble. But suddenly they were early, maybe they just wanna get it over with, I know I did.

So I got there Amy was 2 persons before me and she was next, so I thought, well, I got about 30 min, which mean I'll be out of there before 4, which is all good.. but then they skipped Gorette, cause she wasn't there, but they were 20 min before her scheduled time. So, they came right to me.

They liked my book.

So, I'm happy about that, I've been dreading it.. and kinda scared. I mean if I didn't get the grade then it's another damn semester and I'm sick of school. Anyway, I got out of there waaaaaaaaaaay before 4 and feeling pretty good. But now I'm just all burnt out.

I did a few sketches for Faith and Buffy to-be comic.. and a new layout for my homepage and writing at the same time. Well, I don't have school to deal with anymore, so it's cool.

dignified in what she does when she sings
the smile that she brings to all of you
unaware of what’s to come, I said tell me:
what’s to come

green is the color of my envy
it’s the color of fame
so I’m gonna write it down
I’m gonna scream it out
and I’m never gonna be the same again

fear is the color you’ve all exposed
now I gotta get up here and prove the importance
of my clothes and my pose I suppose
again

hard core superstar by far
you’re the ultimate star
do you wanna be a superstar?
well that’s what you are
you’re gonna be a star
do you wanna be a superstar?

clever in what she does
competing for the attention
of those people that you know
my whole life revolves around your absence
until I can’t remember
what I was, what I am,
what I know or where I go

every moment was that moment
every day was that day
every second was that second
and I’ve lost myself again
yes I’ve lost myself again

hard core superstar by far
you’re the ultimate star
do you wanna be a superstar?
well that’s what you are
you’re gonna be a star
do you wanna be a superstar?

and soon my face will be on every magazine
then my voice will be on every frequency
take my heart — while you’re at it
why don’t you sign me up to sell me out

hard core superstar by far
you’re the ultimate star
do you wanna be a superstar?

I am my angel 'til death I do
I saw my first angel and it was you

. . . what’s to come?

[ Superstar | Tegan&Sara ]

Ok, I lost my watch... How? I don't know.

It's my navy blue Casio G-Shock Chris got for me in exchanged for me getting her a A-Wire Oakley shades. Yeah... well, she didn't know yet..

So, that was my incentive to go and get my other watch Nautica battery change.. which I did and I'm back wearing that one now. I'm thinking of getting another G-Shock.. the one with Solar power or whatever.. looks pretty good.. I liked it. But it'll be another $150 that I'm not sure I wanna spend. Oh well...

I got another 7 pictures to draw.. I got enough paper I think.. already cut them got 30 pieces. Man, and I freaked over it.. For some reason I got the number 13 pieces in my head.. and well... ha ha.. Hopefully I won't need to take another trip.. but I will know by the end of the week, cause it's almost finish with the drawing, and now it's making sure layout is consistance and I will print them all out.. tomorrow will be writing center visit and get story worked on.. truthfully I don't think they would read it, but hey.. You never know.

Listening : Finding Myself

Ok, it's that time of the year again... yup, crunch time!!! Oh Joy..

Ok, so I got 12 days.. or rather a week, I have to do that so i get things done on time.. in the next 2 days I'll be finishing up all the illustrations and then figuring out the page number and print them.. I keep thinking 13 pages.. and well, nope! it's 28 with the credit and intro and with covers 30.. which mean I'm short on papers.. I'll cut them up tomorrow and figure out how many more sheets I will need. Then the cover and the poster, which will have to wait till all the illustrations are done.. but I can start with the cover tomorrow I think.

Oh happy happy joy joy..

Went to see 'Mean Girls' today, it was good.. I like Linsey Lohan... (if that's how her name's spell) Now I'm just busting my ass trying to get more stuff done.. everything due on the 13.. so I gotta get them done like a week before if possible.. (yeah, right) At least SS stuff gonna have to be done, like it or not.. tomorrow, buying stuff... gotta get some paper..

In the mean time.. I made some collages that probably can be used as wallpaper.. (cause I kept the size at 1024x768) Mistress, Weakness, and my latest Lost

I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph; I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

Cause Im broken when I’m open
And I don’t feel like I am strong enough
Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away

The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There’s so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

Cause Im broken when I’m open
And I dont feel like I am strong enough
Cause Im broken when I’m lonesome
And I dont feel right when you’re gone away

Cause Im broken when I’m open
And I dont feel like I am strong enough
Cause Im broken when I’m lonesome
And I dont feel light when you’re gone away

[ Broken | Seether ]

Ok, turned in my stuff for figure drawing today, my advisor still didn't get that damn thing he was suppose to get for me yet, I cut him some slack seeing how it's the advising week still and he had appointment right to about 4pm. No use riding his ass about it.

I'm sleeping...

still enough
although I know you're not begging
still as the thoughts running through your mind
still enough
although I know you're not begging
give me a reason to make you mine

I will devour you
take all the pain away
I cannot stay my hand
from reaching out so that I can
empower you
for all eternity
it seems to ease my mind
to know that you've brought
meaning to my life

had enough
although I see you're not running
still are the thoughts running through your mind
dead to love
the path that you are now taking
show me the reason to make you mine

run, to where the smallest ray of light will never find you
run, to where you will not need to shield your eyes
run, away from all the soulless, heartless fiends who hound you
run, away and let your memories go blind
when I...